andy: it really depends on how well your audience understands a parlimentary system.
amy: your mom explained the parliamentary system to me last night.
andy: she likes to dissolve parliament from time to time ...
amy: I used to have this roommate...late at night, sometimes I could hear "ORDER IN THE COURT" and "IF I MAY PRESENT..." and "OBJECTION!" intermixed with moaning and yelling
amy: I couldn't tell if the banging was a gavel or the headboard against the wall
amy: i assume, sometimes, that it was both
--
andy: papercraft ceiling cat just ate my brain.
andy: good morning.
--
amy: i built this city on rock and roll.
andy: i've heard that parts of the city were built on rock and roll, but due to the use of corrupt contractors, a great deal of it was built on disco and a certain section is built almost entirely on techno.
--
andy: given the popularity of chuck norris and the "i'm fucking matt damon" video on youtube, i'm trying to figure out why "i'm fucking chuck norris" gives so few hits on google.
--
(about the eee pc)
amy: i'm a little iffy about the screen size
amy: but other than that, it looks so cute that it could be the pet i don't have
andy: and it won't pee on the carpet.
amy: yet.
andy: yet
--
amy: i used "that's what she said," on my dad last night
amy: he didn't get it
andy: that's because i was getting it.
andy: from your mom.
--
amy: hey, you remind me
andy: of the babe
andy: what babe.
andy: the babe with the power.
andy: what power?
andy: sorry, a little david bowie slipped in.
--
andy: i would imagine they could do some damage.
amy: i damaged your mom last night
amy: SNAP
amy: man
amy: someone needs to shoot the lame one-trick-pony
andy: nah
andy: we like watching it limp around.
amy: [coworker] and I can't have a real conversation anymore
amy: it's all "your mom" jokes
amy: it's pretty sad.
andy: just pretend that you're blazing new trails of communication.
andy: i mean, you aren't, but just pretend.
--
amy: "in my pants"
amy: that's the one my friend uses all of the time
amy: I somehow feel that, as a girl, this line is not as effective when I use it
amy: then again
amy: I've been doing "your mom" since 2001
andy: i think it works.
andy: and i've been doing your mom for a lot longer.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Saturday, March 8, 2008
where's this post been?
andy: the tubes must have been backed up.
andy: with poop.
andy: internet poop.
--
amy: if anything exciting happens, I'm relying on you to let me know
amy: this includes gunfights.
andy: jesus, if i had to tell you about every gunfight i would never get anything done.
--
andy: client/server arch is sexy in some ways.
andy: but like your mom in a teddy, it doesn't always do exactly what you want.
amy: ...
--
andy: do you think the files i put in the windows recycling bin really
get recycled, or do they just get thrown away at the end of the day?
amy: they go to doggy heaven
amy: we didn't want to tell you this when you were younger, but...
andy: doggy heaven, eh?
andy: i just imagined doggie heaven was a bunch of disembodied legs to hump.
andy: i suddenly had a flash of the world's third most disturbing niche porn market, and now i'm going to try to forget it.
--
amy: porn destroyed the internet a long time ago
amy: we scavenge in the ruins now
andy: porn created the internet.
andy: porn and video games.
amy: and your mom
amy: and al gore
amy: they made a baby together
amy: and it was the internet
andy: seriously, who do you think was asking for high-bandwith connections?
andy: your mom is al gore.
andy: you see, it is funny, because it kind of sounds like "your mom is a whore"
andy: which she is.
--
andy: just think of me as google with swearing.
--
andy: i live by the idea that there are things you cannot unknow, no
matter how hard you try.
amy: yeah. that probably explains why i can't get my intimate knowledge of your mom out of my head.
andy: yes, that is one reason.
--
andy: ah spring.
andy: i remember seasons.
amy: back in my day, we had to walk 15 miles in the snow uphill, both ways, in order to experience a season
andy: yeah, but once we got through nuclear winter, everything went back to normal.
andy: except the mutants.
andy: fucking mutants.
--
amy: i like puppies.
andy: they are tasty.
--
amy: uhh
amy: you're weird.
andy: a year and a half of working together and i finally coax that out of you.
amy: oh, but i've been thinking it all along.
amy: i even mouth it sometimes when your back is turned
andy: with poop.
andy: internet poop.
--
amy: if anything exciting happens, I'm relying on you to let me know
amy: this includes gunfights.
andy: jesus, if i had to tell you about every gunfight i would never get anything done.
--
andy: client/server arch is sexy in some ways.
andy: but like your mom in a teddy, it doesn't always do exactly what you want.
amy: ...
--
andy: do you think the files i put in the windows recycling bin really
get recycled, or do they just get thrown away at the end of the day?
amy: they go to doggy heaven
amy: we didn't want to tell you this when you were younger, but...
andy: doggy heaven, eh?
andy: i just imagined doggie heaven was a bunch of disembodied legs to hump.
andy: i suddenly had a flash of the world's third most disturbing niche porn market, and now i'm going to try to forget it.
--
amy: porn destroyed the internet a long time ago
amy: we scavenge in the ruins now
andy: porn created the internet.
andy: porn and video games.
amy: and your mom
amy: and al gore
amy: they made a baby together
amy: and it was the internet
andy: seriously, who do you think was asking for high-bandwith connections?
andy: your mom is al gore.
andy: you see, it is funny, because it kind of sounds like "your mom is a whore"
andy: which she is.
--
andy: just think of me as google with swearing.
--
andy: i live by the idea that there are things you cannot unknow, no
matter how hard you try.
amy: yeah. that probably explains why i can't get my intimate knowledge of your mom out of my head.
andy: yes, that is one reason.
--
andy: ah spring.
andy: i remember seasons.
amy: back in my day, we had to walk 15 miles in the snow uphill, both ways, in order to experience a season
andy: yeah, but once we got through nuclear winter, everything went back to normal.
andy: except the mutants.
andy: fucking mutants.
--
amy: i like puppies.
andy: they are tasty.
--
amy: uhh
amy: you're weird.
andy: a year and a half of working together and i finally coax that out of you.
amy: oh, but i've been thinking it all along.
amy: i even mouth it sometimes when your back is turned
Monday, February 18, 2008
blog cat says...
"meow, we're back."
--
andy: emo cat says: friends are mean.
amy: sarcastic cat says: did emo cat weep when he said that?
amy: also, does emo cat wear too-tight pants?
amy: and if so, where does his tail fit?
andy: stupid question cat refuses to dignify that with a response.
amy: well stupid question cat is just no fun and probably never gets laid
--
amy: i've got pavarotti stuck in my head
andy: there are worse places for him to be stuck.
amy: like the back of a chevy?
--
andy: i had your mom's cat on my arm the other night.
amy: double-entendre cat says: WIN
amy: but
amy: double-entendre cat also says: confused and trying not to picture how that works.
andy: race to the bottom cat says: i am wearin led boots.
amy: man, race-to-the-bottom cat must have a pretty stiff-legged gait, then
andy: he does, but once he hits the water there are none faster.
--
andy: VPXL+ IS GUARANTEED TO EN`L@RGE & STRENGTHEN YOUR PHALLUS OR YOUR MONEY BACK - PERIOD! SO WHY WAIT? GET VPXL+ AND LIVE LARGE TODAY!
andy: stupid question cat wonders: why wait, indeed?
andy: stupid question cat has leveled up. he is now ironic contradiction cat.
--
amy: yeah. turn that into a ymj. i dare you.
andy: i was just going to sit here and ignore it.
amy: I IGNORED YOUR MOM LAST NIGHT!!!
amy: that's right: i hurt her feelings.
amy: man, i am a bitch.
andy: she said she was happier that way.
andy: she had a head ache.
amy: you suck.
--
andy: http://www.codecommit.com/blog/scala/scala-for-java-refugees-part-1
andy: "You're comfortable with Java, you know its ins and outs, its moods. It's like an old girlfriend; you may not feel the vibe anymore, but you know just how to rub it so it smiles."
andy: someday we'll figure out why there aren't more women in the computer industry.
--
amy: amy cat wonders: are we going to talk through cats all day?
amy: not that there's a problem with that.
amy: but amy cat is curious.
amy: and amused.
andy: magic 8 ball cat says: ask again later.
--
amy: one of my friends was over last week playing katamari damacy, and I got pretty violently ill if I looked at the screen for more than 2 minutes
andy: yeah, that happens.
andy: the vomitting is weakness leaving the body.
andy: and landing on your floor.
andy: weakness smells bad, and discolors the carpet.
--
andy: psycho-analytical cat says: tell me about your mom.
--
andy: andy's-giant-guns-cat says: you fail
--
andy: joke cat says: what's the difference between a mcdonalds and a brothel?
amy: clueless cat says: um, do you want fries with that?
andy: YOUR MOM!!!
amy: critical cat says: that was terrible, but funny
andy: partner in crime cat says: i have to get one in before you leave.
andy: ymj
--
andy: emo cat says: friends are mean.
amy: sarcastic cat says: did emo cat weep when he said that?
amy: also, does emo cat wear too-tight pants?
amy: and if so, where does his tail fit?
andy: stupid question cat refuses to dignify that with a response.
amy: well stupid question cat is just no fun and probably never gets laid
--
amy: i've got pavarotti stuck in my head
andy: there are worse places for him to be stuck.
amy: like the back of a chevy?
--
andy: i had your mom's cat on my arm the other night.
amy: double-entendre cat says: WIN
amy: but
amy: double-entendre cat also says: confused and trying not to picture how that works.
andy: race to the bottom cat says: i am wearin led boots.
amy: man, race-to-the-bottom cat must have a pretty stiff-legged gait, then
andy: he does, but once he hits the water there are none faster.
--
andy: VPXL+ IS GUARANTEED TO EN`L@RGE & STRENGTHEN YOUR PHALLUS OR YOUR MONEY BACK - PERIOD! SO WHY WAIT? GET VPXL+ AND LIVE LARGE TODAY!
andy: stupid question cat wonders: why wait, indeed?
andy: stupid question cat has leveled up. he is now ironic contradiction cat.
--
amy: yeah. turn that into a ymj. i dare you.
andy: i was just going to sit here and ignore it.
amy: I IGNORED YOUR MOM LAST NIGHT!!!
amy: that's right: i hurt her feelings.
amy: man, i am a bitch.
andy: she said she was happier that way.
andy: she had a head ache.
amy: you suck.
--
andy: http://www.codecommit.com/blog/scala/scala-for-java-refugees-part-1
andy: "You're comfortable with Java, you know its ins and outs, its moods. It's like an old girlfriend; you may not feel the vibe anymore, but you know just how to rub it so it smiles."
andy: someday we'll figure out why there aren't more women in the computer industry.
--
amy: amy cat wonders: are we going to talk through cats all day?
amy: not that there's a problem with that.
amy: but amy cat is curious.
amy: and amused.
andy: magic 8 ball cat says: ask again later.
--
amy: one of my friends was over last week playing katamari damacy, and I got pretty violently ill if I looked at the screen for more than 2 minutes
andy: yeah, that happens.
andy: the vomitting is weakness leaving the body.
andy: and landing on your floor.
andy: weakness smells bad, and discolors the carpet.
--
andy: psycho-analytical cat says: tell me about your mom.
--
andy: andy's-giant-guns-cat says: you fail
--
andy: joke cat says: what's the difference between a mcdonalds and a brothel?
amy: clueless cat says: um, do you want fries with that?
andy: YOUR MOM!!!
amy: critical cat says: that was terrible, but funny
andy: partner in crime cat says: i have to get one in before you leave.
andy: ymj
Saturday, December 22, 2007
a long overdue update
...because I suck at blog.
--
andy: emo - the musical
amy: the stage full of hipsters.
amy: wow.
amy: i can imagine it now.
amy: even though i'm trying pretty hard not to.
--
andy: i remixed your mom last night.
andy: i added some new beats.
--
amy: http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/12/02/crabby-old-man-kitteh-tellz-u-boring-storeez/
amy: that would have been better with "crabby old man kitteh tellz u to get off his dam lawn!"
andy: crabby old man kitty invades your sleep and steals your dreams.
amy: crabby old man kitty could have gotten away with it if it wasn't for those darn kids!
--
amy: i have blue screen of deathed two times today
andy: windows is all powerful.
andy: it made you think you were seeing blue so that it could get real work done without you bothering it.
amy: windows is the real man's operating system.
andy: real men like to get sucker-punched.
--
andy: "I want these motherfucking agents of the Magisterium off this motherfucking balloon!"
--
andy: what's the point of a bug tracking system if you can't call someone an ass-hatted uncle fucker sometimes?
--
andy: and no, i have not gone to a church to recruit.
andy: i'm not sure i could do that.
andy: unless they were snake handlers.
amy: i think that would be amazing.
andy: well duh.
--
andy: [coworker] is rocking a goatee.
andy: no, i lied.
andy: no one "rocks" a goatee.
amy: i don't know. [coworker] rocks a lot of other things.
amy: haha
andy: if it was possible to rock a goatee, [coworker] would be doing it.
andy: currently, there is a goatee attached to [coworker]'s face.
amy: it may be slowly sucking the life out of him
amy: be careful
--
amy: wow, cupcakeblog just makes me want to eat baked goods
amy: i kind of want to follow this woman around and steal all of her cooling cupcakes from her windowsill
andy: sugar makes me want to eat baked goods.
amy: your mom makes me want to eat baked goods
andy: i ate your mom last night after she got baked.
andy: massive fail cat says: welcome to my world.
--
andy: emo - the musical
amy: the stage full of hipsters.
amy: wow.
amy: i can imagine it now.
amy: even though i'm trying pretty hard not to.
--
andy: i remixed your mom last night.
andy: i added some new beats.
--
amy: http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/12/02/crabby-old-man-kitteh-tellz-u-boring-storeez/
amy: that would have been better with "crabby old man kitteh tellz u to get off his dam lawn!"
andy: crabby old man kitty invades your sleep and steals your dreams.
amy: crabby old man kitty could have gotten away with it if it wasn't for those darn kids!
--
amy: i have blue screen of deathed two times today
andy: windows is all powerful.
andy: it made you think you were seeing blue so that it could get real work done without you bothering it.
amy: windows is the real man's operating system.
andy: real men like to get sucker-punched.
--
andy: "I want these motherfucking agents of the Magisterium off this motherfucking balloon!"
--
andy: what's the point of a bug tracking system if you can't call someone an ass-hatted uncle fucker sometimes?
--
andy: and no, i have not gone to a church to recruit.
andy: i'm not sure i could do that.
andy: unless they were snake handlers.
amy: i think that would be amazing.
andy: well duh.
--
andy: [coworker] is rocking a goatee.
andy: no, i lied.
andy: no one "rocks" a goatee.
amy: i don't know. [coworker] rocks a lot of other things.
amy: haha
andy: if it was possible to rock a goatee, [coworker] would be doing it.
andy: currently, there is a goatee attached to [coworker]'s face.
amy: it may be slowly sucking the life out of him
amy: be careful
--
amy: wow, cupcakeblog just makes me want to eat baked goods
amy: i kind of want to follow this woman around and steal all of her cooling cupcakes from her windowsill
andy: sugar makes me want to eat baked goods.
amy: your mom makes me want to eat baked goods
andy: i ate your mom last night after she got baked.
andy: massive fail cat says: welcome to my world.
Saturday, November 10, 2007
it's been awhile
Er, just note the name change above. I've moved to a new state, but we have the same great conversations, just less frequently. Oh, and CNN still sucks.
--
andy: http://www.cnn.com/2007/SHOWBIZ/TV/10/22/apontv.castyourfate.ap/index.html
andy: a. misleading headline
andy: b. article far less sexy than headline would imply.
andy: c. why am i reading cnn?
andy: it's really not worth reading, mostly for the last reason i mention.
amy: a) yeah, that is pretty lame
amy: b) no anecdotes!!!
amy: c) have you learned nothing?
amy: cnn is a bastion of disappointment and pandering
andy: and i keep falling for it.
amy: so does the rest of america
amy: don't feel so bad.
--
andy: and people with fast computers.
amy: your mom had a fast computer last night
amy: OHHH SNAP
andy: i have been served.
amy: quite verily, sir.
--
amy:
http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/11/08/fluffy-reporting-live-from-downtown-philly/
amy: "fluffy is in ur ghetoz, reportin live!"
andy: that's a fucked up picture.
andy: i call photoshop.
amy: i dunno
amy: why go through the trouble to photoshop a blurry cat into the foreground?
andy: we're talking about icanhascheezburger, and you just used the phrase "why go through the trouble".
andy: think about that.
amy: ...
--
andy: by the way, i just got a megadik spam in the form of a poem
andy: At last you've found a lass that's hot You wanna plough her tasteful twat. She's full of passion, she's so nice! But would your penile size suffice? Not sure she will wish for more? You need a dong she would adore! But how to get it long and thick? Your only hope is MegaDik! You'll get so wanted super-size And see great
pleasure in her eyes! Your rod will slam her pink so deep, Tonight you'll hardly fall asleep! So try today this magic p'ill And change your life at your own will!
andy: eh, line breaks just died, didn't they?
amy: i think a small part of all of us just died, honestly.
andy: come on, that's the best spam ever.
andy: somebody really tried.
amy: so did the guy who wrote all of those nantucket limericks, but you'll notice he only ever talks about other people getting laid.
--
andy: http://www.cnn.com/2007/SHOWBIZ/TV/10/22/apontv.castyourfate.ap/index.html
andy: a. misleading headline
andy: b. article far less sexy than headline would imply.
andy: c. why am i reading cnn?
andy: it's really not worth reading, mostly for the last reason i mention.
amy: a) yeah, that is pretty lame
amy: b) no anecdotes!!!
amy: c) have you learned nothing?
amy: cnn is a bastion of disappointment and pandering
andy: and i keep falling for it.
amy: so does the rest of america
amy: don't feel so bad.
--
andy: and people with fast computers.
amy: your mom had a fast computer last night
amy: OHHH SNAP
andy: i have been served.
amy: quite verily, sir.
--
amy:
http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/11/08/fluffy-reporting-live-from-downtown-philly/
amy: "fluffy is in ur ghetoz, reportin live!"
andy: that's a fucked up picture.
andy: i call photoshop.
amy: i dunno
amy: why go through the trouble to photoshop a blurry cat into the foreground?
andy: we're talking about icanhascheezburger, and you just used the phrase "why go through the trouble".
andy: think about that.
amy: ...
--
andy: by the way, i just got a megadik spam in the form of a poem
andy: At last you've found a lass that's hot You wanna plough her tasteful twat. She's full of passion, she's so nice! But would your penile size suffice? Not sure she will wish for more? You need a dong she would adore! But how to get it long and thick? Your only hope is MegaDik! You'll get so wanted super-size And see great
pleasure in her eyes! Your rod will slam her pink so deep, Tonight you'll hardly fall asleep! So try today this magic p'ill And change your life at your own will!
andy: eh, line breaks just died, didn't they?
amy: i think a small part of all of us just died, honestly.
andy: come on, that's the best spam ever.
andy: somebody really tried.
amy: so did the guy who wrote all of those nantucket limericks, but you'll notice he only ever talks about other people getting laid.
Friday, October 19, 2007
an accumulation of the last two weeks
because things have been really, really busy.
--
andy: tastes like christmas.
andy: i probably said that last time, too.
andy: i only say five or six things.
andy: most of them end with "fuck"
--
andy: http://www.myspace.com/clubdeluxesf
andy: you should go to the "Yo Mamma! Slam 2007"
amy: nah
amy: i'm not about insulting your mom
amy: just celebrating her
--
andy: http://www.metacritic.com/games/platforms/ds/imaginebabyz
amy: we have come a long way since the sack of flour
andy: and in some ways, not far enough.
--
andy: just get off my damned lawn.
--
amy: http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/2007/10/a-wise-wise-ani.html
andy: i'm pretty sure that rabbit could eat a person.
amy: i'm pretty sure it already has.
amy: (neil diamond, in fact)
--
andy: i'm still not sure about how i feel about the "illegal sex with
your mom" angle.
andy: i mean, we did it at a lot of different angles.
andy: but still.
amy: i hear there's websites out there on the internet for that sort of thing
andy: there are three.
andy: one isn't very good, though.
--
amy: good spam subject line: "Does your penis ruin your life?"
andy: always.
amy: penises frequently ruin mine as well.
amy: :-/
--
amy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YbaTur4A1OU
amy: you just got duckrolled
amy: bitch.
andy: i hit your mom with a duck last night.
--
(when andy was complaining about how he keeps receiving other people's email)
amy: have you ever considered legally changing your name to something
other than "andrew"?
andy: have you ever considered GOING TO HELL!?!?
--
amy: ymj
amy: (just throwing that out there. gotta keep you on your toes.)
andy: only fair, since i kept your mom on her toes last night.
andy: ZING
amy: yeah, i was waiting for that.
andy: so was she.
--
amy: http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/2007/10/tocktober-icy-c.html
amy: BEAR ASS
andy: jesus.
andy: that's something i don't need to see again.
--
andy: http://news.yahoo.com/s/livescience/20071012/sc_livescience/forecastsexandmarriagewithrobotsby2050
amy: yeahhh, i saw that. those netherlands kids are craaaazy.
andy: crazy like a robot-fucking fox.
amy: but hey, i guess there's some reassurance in knowing the robot
won't break your heart.
amy: well, unless you want it to.
amy: with its fists.
andy: people already have sex with robots all the time.
andy: nobody wants to marry a vibrator.
--
andy: (andy has left the building. please leave a message.)
--
andy: tastes like christmas.
andy: i probably said that last time, too.
andy: i only say five or six things.
andy: most of them end with "fuck"
--
andy: http://www.myspace.com/clubdeluxesf
andy: you should go to the "Yo Mamma! Slam 2007"
amy: nah
amy: i'm not about insulting your mom
amy: just celebrating her
--
andy: http://www.metacritic.com/games/platforms/ds/imaginebabyz
amy: we have come a long way since the sack of flour
andy: and in some ways, not far enough.
--
andy: just get off my damned lawn.
--
amy: http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/2007/10/a-wise-wise-ani.html
andy: i'm pretty sure that rabbit could eat a person.
amy: i'm pretty sure it already has.
amy: (neil diamond, in fact)
--
andy: i'm still not sure about how i feel about the "illegal sex with
your mom" angle.
andy: i mean, we did it at a lot of different angles.
andy: but still.
amy: i hear there's websites out there on the internet for that sort of thing
andy: there are three.
andy: one isn't very good, though.
--
amy: good spam subject line: "Does your penis ruin your life?"
andy: always.
amy: penises frequently ruin mine as well.
amy: :-/
--
amy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YbaTur4A1OU
amy: you just got duckrolled
amy: bitch.
andy: i hit your mom with a duck last night.
--
(when andy was complaining about how he keeps receiving other people's email)
amy: have you ever considered legally changing your name to something
other than "andrew"?
andy: have you ever considered GOING TO HELL!?!?
--
amy: ymj
amy: (just throwing that out there. gotta keep you on your toes.)
andy: only fair, since i kept your mom on her toes last night.
andy: ZING
amy: yeah, i was waiting for that.
andy: so was she.
--
amy: http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/2007/10/tocktober-icy-c.html
amy: BEAR ASS
andy: jesus.
andy: that's something i don't need to see again.
--
andy: http://news.yahoo.com/s/livescience/20071012/sc_livescience/forecastsexandmarriagewithrobotsby2050
amy: yeahhh, i saw that. those netherlands kids are craaaazy.
andy: crazy like a robot-fucking fox.
amy: but hey, i guess there's some reassurance in knowing the robot
won't break your heart.
amy: well, unless you want it to.
amy: with its fists.
andy: people already have sex with robots all the time.
andy: nobody wants to marry a vibrator.
--
andy: (andy has left the building. please leave a message.)
Monday, October 1, 2007
(after i made my first YMJ after my return to the office)
andy: i knew i was missing something.
andy: welcome back.
--
andy: so, you're going to the baseball game, right?
amy: ...
amy: will your mom be there?
andy: a;sfjas;df
amy: come on, you can come up with a witty retort!
amy: you can do it!
amy: i believe in you!
andy: now you're just being mean.
--
andy: yalp.com
andy: i haven't gone yet.
andy: porn or not porn?
andy: cast your vote.
--
amy: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Simply_Irresistible
amy: i mean, seriously? an "enchanted crab"?
amy: that sounds like something you catch after a one night stand with a fairy godmother. not something that makes you a "superb food witch"
andy: movies that do not feature a super-hero created by a nuclear accident or a wise-cracking ghost with a secret are automatically suspect.
--
(after discussing this)
amy: oh well
amy: sexism goes on.
andy: and it will go on until we get robots to review products.
andy: sexy shiny review robots.
amy: do i need to give you a moment alone with the review robots?
andy: ... no
andy: sadly
--
andy: are you "loving" your pet to death?
andy: CNN headlines rule.
--
amy: http://www.cnn.com/2007/TECH/09/26/nerd.auction.ap/index.html
amy: i've seen craigslist ads like this
andy: yeah, that's just what i was thinking.
amy: except they usually end with sexual favors
andy: yup, that's the one.
--
andy: "customers who bough items like this also bought ..."
andy: how many pairs of rainboots does one human need?
amy: you need to accessorize!
amy: it's easier if you've just got multiple sets of galoshes
amy: yes, this is how women think.
andy: all of them.
amy: even some men.
amy: it's an overwhelming consciousness
amy: submit to it, mr. i-have-two-bikes
amy: or else you will be assimilated into the borg collective by force
andy: ok, first off, my bikes don't match my clothes. in fact, [coworker]'s opinion aside, my bikes have about 0 style.
andy: second, at some point in this conversation i began to wonder about the correlation between owning multiple pairs of galoshes and wanting a baby in your belly.
andy: i'm thinking they might be positively related in some way, which makes me giggle, because at some point when you have a baby you'll think back on this and want to kick my ass for pointing it out.
--
amy: http://mfrost.typepad.com/.shared/image.html?/photos/uncategorized/2007/09/26/iminyourgardenco.jpg
amy: cuteoverload posted this mantis specifically to highlight his poop.
andy: wow.
andy: go internet.
andy: what i said about cuteoverload and anal fixation stands.
--
(making fun of Vista and the new voice-recognition capability...)
andy: You can say "How do I" followed by a task you want to perform with your computer. For example, "How do I change my desktop background?"
andy: How do I get a better computer?
andy: How do I level up?
amy: "How do I find your mom?"
andy: shit
andy: ambush!
amy: ohhhh snap
andy: i'm not sure i want the computer to do what i tell it to do.
amy: it ruins the surprise?
amy: doesn't windows already not do what you tell it to do?
andy: non-deterministic computing rocks.
amy: "don't phone home"
amy: "don't run IE"
amy: "don't suck"
andy: eh, it just obeys a subset of commands.
andy: "freeze up"
andy: "hog memory"
andy: "take forever to log in"
andy: managed expectations have gotten me this far.
andy: welcome back.
--
andy: so, you're going to the baseball game, right?
amy: ...
amy: will your mom be there?
andy: a;sfjas;df
amy: come on, you can come up with a witty retort!
amy: you can do it!
amy: i believe in you!
andy: now you're just being mean.
--
andy: yalp.com
andy: i haven't gone yet.
andy: porn or not porn?
andy: cast your vote.
--
amy: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Simply_Irresistible
amy: i mean, seriously? an "enchanted crab"?
amy: that sounds like something you catch after a one night stand with a fairy godmother. not something that makes you a "superb food witch"
andy: movies that do not feature a super-hero created by a nuclear accident or a wise-cracking ghost with a secret are automatically suspect.
--
(after discussing this)
amy: oh well
amy: sexism goes on.
andy: and it will go on until we get robots to review products.
andy: sexy shiny review robots.
amy: do i need to give you a moment alone with the review robots?
andy: ... no
andy: sadly
--
andy: are you "loving" your pet to death?
andy: CNN headlines rule.
--
amy: http://www.cnn.com/2007/TECH/09/26/nerd.auction.ap/index.html
amy: i've seen craigslist ads like this
andy: yeah, that's just what i was thinking.
amy: except they usually end with sexual favors
andy: yup, that's the one.
--
andy: "customers who bough items like this also bought ..."
andy: how many pairs of rainboots does one human need?
amy: you need to accessorize!
amy: it's easier if you've just got multiple sets of galoshes
amy: yes, this is how women think.
andy: all of them.
amy: even some men.
amy: it's an overwhelming consciousness
amy: submit to it, mr. i-have-two-bikes
amy: or else you will be assimilated into the borg collective by force
andy: ok, first off, my bikes don't match my clothes. in fact, [coworker]'s opinion aside, my bikes have about 0 style.
andy: second, at some point in this conversation i began to wonder about the correlation between owning multiple pairs of galoshes and wanting a baby in your belly.
andy: i'm thinking they might be positively related in some way, which makes me giggle, because at some point when you have a baby you'll think back on this and want to kick my ass for pointing it out.
--
amy: http://mfrost.typepad.com/.shared/image.html?/photos/uncategorized/2007/09/26/iminyourgardenco.jpg
amy: cuteoverload posted this mantis specifically to highlight his poop.
andy: wow.
andy: go internet.
andy: what i said about cuteoverload and anal fixation stands.
--
(making fun of Vista and the new voice-recognition capability...)
andy: You can say "How do I" followed by a task you want to perform with your computer. For example, "How do I change my desktop background?"
andy: How do I get a better computer?
andy: How do I level up?
amy: "How do I find your mom?"
andy: shit
andy: ambush!
amy: ohhhh snap
andy: i'm not sure i want the computer to do what i tell it to do.
amy: it ruins the surprise?
amy: doesn't windows already not do what you tell it to do?
andy: non-deterministic computing rocks.
amy: "don't phone home"
amy: "don't run IE"
amy: "don't suck"
andy: eh, it just obeys a subset of commands.
andy: "freeze up"
andy: "hog memory"
andy: "take forever to log in"
andy: managed expectations have gotten me this far.
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