andy: our swords clashed, and there were sparks.

amy: i wonder what the application of "oh lol" would be in lolcode?
andy: generic recursion.
amy: meh
amy: not good enough
amy: i want puppies to fall from the sky or something when i use "oh lol"
amy: and lest you get the wrong idea, they will have parachutes
andy: parachutes of death!!!
amy: you are an odd vegetarian.
andy: i just really hate vegetables.
amy: yeah, i bet that'll teach them a lesson

--

amy: yeah, yeah, that is what my gender does: rant and nag.
andy: did you just sell women out? because that was awesome.
amy: yep. someone's got to counterbalance the feminists.
[pause]
andy: remember that time you kicked feminism in the stomach?

--

amy: i need to develop my hobbies
amy: this lolcat thing is getting old
andy: inappropriate captions of pictures of the pope?
amy: has no one lolcatted the man yet?
andy: lol != inappropriate.
amy: i dunno, i think FOX has my back if i disagree with that statement
andy: fair enough

--

amy: http://littledemocrats.net/
andy: sometimes i want to punch a lot of people at the same time.
andy: but since i can only punch in a serial manner, I'll start withwhoever drew the picture on the cover.

--

amy: http://www.xmethods.net/ve2/ViewListing.po?key=uuid:2A84F5D4-7736-0C2B-C51D-E3D9AC53D641
amy: what i like is that there is a "Death Master File"
andy: i am become death, destroyer of SANDWICHES!!!
amy: sounds like an exciting business card
andy: is this web service like the ring, where i'll die in three days if i don't show it to somebody else?
andy: wait, is that why you showed it to me?
andy: shit.
amy: you have caught on to my staying-alive pyramid scheme
amy: sorry man, but i do what i gotta do

--

andy: that picture is six kinds of awesome.
amy: i don't think he did that protest the right way
andy: "To make it more palatable, the corgi was turned into meat balls and served with salad."
andy: more palatable than, say, boiled corgi?
andy: i mean, he is british.
amy: meatballs are gross. grilled corgi is obviously the way to go.
andy: i'm thinking about it, and i can't come up with a good caption for a guy eating a dog.
amy: sounds like a personal problem.

--

amy: http://www.cnn.com/2007/TECH/science/05/30/cheetah.infidelity.reut/index.html
amy: i'm surprised CNN didn't just skip to "female cheetas are a bunch of sluts"
amy: for a headline
andy: nah, they'd go with "cheetas are cheaters" or something like that.

--

andy: everybody knows .duck files are only used by the killing robots.
andy: and trust me, the get pissed if non-killing robots (or non-robots) use them.
amy: i thought robots used .humans-must-die
andy: they do that, too.
andy: they're sneaky.

--

amy: i'll take 'em down
andy: we'll go rent rambo tonight and watch it.
amy: awesome.
amy: the hulk knows how to get shit done
amy: er, hulk hogan, i mean
amy: well, sort of.
andy: he knows well enough.

--

andy: sometimes you're on a roll.
andy: you just have to keep going with what you've got.
amy: and sometimes you're soft cell and make a song called "sex dwarf"?

--

amy: for a SF fan, i do a pretty shitty job of watching their movies.
andy: you just hate god.
amy: nah, i just hate his taste in movies
amy: and beer
andy: touche.

--

andy: http://gizmodo.com/gadgets/gadgets/usb-pole-dancer-220912.php
andy: so, we have the british prudes to thank for giving us this.
amy: i bet she has crooked teeth

--

andy: you can be certain that god has abandoned your city when the hipster undead are seen.
amy: emo zombies cry because someone broke their heart...after ripping it out of their chest
andy: poor emo zombies.

--

amy: http://www.cnn.com/2007/LAW/05/23/coca.cola.sentencing/index.html
andy: wtf is wrong with Joya Williams' face?
andy: did drinking coke do that to him?
amy: it apparently started to transform her into a dog
andy: rather unfortunate.
amy: and here i thought only radiation could do that
amy: but maybe it's coke
amy: or maybe coke has radiation
andy: so is the secret recipe just the ratio of cron syrup to carbonated water?
andy: er . . . corn, not cron.
andy: fucking unix.

--

amy: no nintendogs for me
amy: which is probably a good thing, if the plants on my desk have anything to say about it
andy: the plants don't lick your face.
amy: if the DS nintendogs lick my face, then i think i've got bigger problems than dying plants
andy: ok, true.
andy: but they could at least pretend.
andy: your plant isn't doing any pretending.
andy: unless it's just "playing" dead.

--

andy: attachments are fleeting . . .
andy: be a leaf on the wind.
amy: as i recall, that got someone killed
andy: yeah, but everybody else lived. go on, take one for the team.

--

andy: I AM CURRENTLY IN YOUR CHEEZBURGER DEGRADING THE QUALITY OF YOUR FUNNY
andy: new idea:
andy: VIMM = vomitted in my mouth
andy: VIMMCATS
amy: ...